Lady clown Patsy Pastry has one mission. To be a circus slapstick clown. Follow her messy adventures and give me that pie!
Patsy Pastry in "We do like to pie beside the seas...
I've been getting messy again. After a visit to the seaside, I land up plastered in crust pies and gunged with custard. Mack Sennett studios often featured bathing beauties, so I decided to give it a go. He also said that Mothers weren't supposed to get hit by pies, only Mothers-In-Law. What I forgot was that I am both!
First video is now available
My first video is now available. After putting on my clown face and slipping into my clown costume, I receive an introduction to pie throwing. Pie after pie is thrown at my face until its totally plastered in cream and crust. Only real whipped cream pies are used. All put into a pie crust and topped off with a cherry, in true clown style.
Latest Scenes
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Scene reviews
Sent by real customers
Non-stop slop for Ms. Patsy
This is her messiest video to date. Ms. Patsy is completely destroyed by Peter. She is totally covered with all types of disgusting slop, and, as always. takes it gracefully. There is not an inch of here that isn't covered. It's a great one.
-Allpiedup    7/18/24    
Incrediblely messy mayhem
wow just wow! patsy takes so much mess here it's crazy how she just stands there and isn't phased my the slop and the smell! looking so hot under all that slop it's an amazing vid I'd definitely recommend it. super sexy and such a professional at what she does! cheers patsy and this is so worth a purchase.
-dudeydan85    7/17/24    
Amazing Huge Mess!
Patsy never just gets messy, but gets Really messy! She gets totally covered and doesn't even wipe it off. She knows how to take a mess and you will not be disappointed. Put it in your cart!
-bob1987564    7/16/24    
Another amazing video
Another amazing video from Patsy and Peter. Great creamy pies thrown in Patsy's face with fantastic coverage. Patsy looks stunning as ever dressed as a PC with a cheeky bit of sexy cleavage on show.

Excellent work guys and look forward to more.
-pieguy_eastyorks    7/8/24    
Pies galore for Ms. Patsy
Once again, Ms. Patsy gets a good trashing. She gets five creamy pies in her face, and her cleavage gets pied, followed by creamy salad dressing. The same salad dressing is poured over her head, and her hat is filled with tomato sauce, and, ofcourse, over her head. Ms. Patsy has great expressions before the trashing starts. Another winner is the Patsy Pastry collection.
-Allpiedup    7/4/24    
Revenge for Ms. Patsy! Best video yet.
Ms. Patsy turms the tables on Peter, and gives him an extreme pieing and gunging... and she gets him good! Peter gets it with pies, and all types of sauces and creams, while Ms. Patsy has the biggest grin on her face as she destroys him, and loves doing it. Peter ends up a degraded, humiliated, and defeated piece of slop. The expressions on Ms. Patsys face are as fun to watch as it is to see Peters destroyed face and body. I'd love to see more of Peter getting it.
-Allpiedup    6/16/24    
Flantastic fun with a splosh loving couple
It is great to see a genuine couple that have a love for WAM and it shows in this video. Patsy and her partner as police officers look absolutely amazing and for anyone, such as myself, that likes to see a woman humiliate a guy with pies and mess then this is for you.

The pies are gooey and stick really well and then there is all the savoury mess which just adds another element to his downfall. Patsy looks stunning as a Wpc, my word i would love her to put me in custard-y lol.

Amazing video and look forward to seeing more from you guys x.
-pieguy_eastyorks    6/16/24    
The best sploshing clown on UMD
Really loving Patsy's work. To me she is like the new Clown Julie. The pies are amazing and all the mess is fantastic. Keep it coming Patsy x.
-pieguy_eastyorks    6/16/24    
Total Destruction of Ms. Patsy!
This is Ms. Patsy's most extreme gunging so far. She is totally destroyed in this one, getting all types of nasty condiments poured all over her head. At the end, Ms. Patsy is a humiliated, gross pile of stinky slop.
-Allpiedup    6/7/24    
Pied, creamed, and finger caked
Patsy plays a sweet maid who works for pies, only she gets the pies in ways she didn't expect. She's pied several times (the pies get creamier each time she gets it). After that, she has her head creamed, and finger cakes are stuck in her mouth. As always, she is a mess at the end.
-Allpiedup    5/20/24    
The perfect clown
Patsy is great in this video. She's animated, and her facial expressions are perfect. She takes several sloppy pies to her face, (and these pies are really sloppy). After her face is all pied up, she is finished off with a hat full of custard over her head. I watched it several times, and love it more each time.
-Allpiedup    5/20/24    
Trashed and humiliated!
In this video, Patsy gets the ultimate humilation, and ends up as a defeated pile of slop. The facial expressions are great. It starts off with a gooey pie smashed in Patsys clown-painted face, with a great reaction. This is followed by the slow destruction, with more pies smashed in her face, and globs of ketchup, gravy, and cream poured over her head and face. She also gets a hot dog, roll, and celery stalk shoved in her mouth, along with tomatoes on her eyes. Patsy looks amazing in her clown face, black wig, and outfit, before she is covered with all the mess. Anyone who likes seeing a messy clown will love this.
-Allpiedup    5/20/24    
A great pied clown
I love this one. Lots of creamy pies are smashed into Patsys clown face, and her expressions are hilarious. She plays the perfect clown. I love the outfit and make-up. She takes all the pies, despite shaking her head "no" before getting it. In the end, Patsy looks and acts like a defeated clown. This is a good one.
-Allpiedup    5/20/24    
Top pies and Patsy gets saucy.
Another great scene from Patsy. This has some super pie hits, and the thick flour paste pies, gloop down her face. Then the topping, an assortment of stinky savoury sauces poured over her head, resulting an almighty trashing. For silent clown slapstick this is superb and well worth it. The facial expressions are great and like Patsy covered in all that savoury gloop, you'll relish this scene.
-LeRex    5/20/24    
Simply Flantastic
I wish I was at the seaside to be on the end of one of her pies. Simply Flantastic!
-pieguy_eastyorks    4/29/24    
Do clowns get more sexier than this?
Do clowns get more sexier than this? Patsy is stunning as a clown and takes the pies so well. I can't wait to see more from her...
-pieguy_eastyorks    4/29/24    
More pies please! I think patsy needs way more pies!
I wish i was the one on the receiving end, patsy clearly loves a pie in the face and she looks great in her clown costume. Patsy takes the pies really well and i wish i was her.
-Virgin wammer    4/13/24    
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